Steve

Steve was born in August of 1975, and spent the first six years of his life in Southwest Philadelphia. The block he lived on was harmless, but he feared it nonetheless, rarely going outside. Alarmed by this trend, his parents moved the family to Secane, a suburb not fifteen minutes from the old neighborhood. There, Steve was safe, and free to flourish.

Throughout his adolescent and college years, Steve earned his spending money working at a sandwich shop and officiating ice hockey games. He was once verbally assaulted and threatened by a parent during a middle school game. Soon after that, he hung up the stripes for good. (Steve still makes the best Italian hoagie in the tri-state area.)

The other Minor Prophets and his wife can all vouch that Steve has severe passive aggressive tendencies. In spite of this, and a slight martyr complex, he is generally a nice guy.

He wears shorts and flip-flops year-round, is good at math, and likes to drink.